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After a lifetime of one-sided relationships, they finally found someone they’re truly attracted to. Cue the freakout!

by Dan Savage

I have a history of dating men I’m not attracted to physically or emotionally. I always found it weirdly comforting to know my boyfriend was obsessed with me while I had minimal feelings for him. I have explored this in therapy and chalk it up to lack of self-confidence. But a month ago I started hanging out with this guy and it’s the first relationship I’ve been that isn’t one sided. It’s also the first relationship I’ve been in where the guy wasn’t pushing me to “define the relationship” after a month. This has led to me feeling quite vulnerable and afraid. For the first time in a long time, I’m dating a guy that I not only like but find very attractive and now I’m terrified it will end. This fear has led me to keep my feelings to myself. In previous relationships where I was the one with…

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