TopFeatured.com

Besides hating drone footage, all day every day of my life, and having to share that time with hating other things such as spiders and bass solos, I have one MAJOR FUCKING ISSUE that YOU PEOPLE don’t seem to give any shit about. , and that is The motherfucking COLUMBIA River, obviously named after the great colonizer himself, Christopher(one of the thing I also hate 247 is people that name their children Christopher and then (excuse me, (baarrrf) ) call them “Topher”, ) … Columbus! So what the Fuck! are you gonna do about that? Call me.

[Editor’s note: We don’t have your number to call you, but this is what a brief Google search revealed about how the Columbia River was named. “Originally called ‘Rio de San Roque’ by Spanish explorers, in 1792 the river was renamed “Columbia” by Boston fur trader Robert Gray, who named it after his ship.” But maybe the dude’s ship was named after Columbus? In any case, you are absolutely correct that “Topher” is a stupid fucking name.]

[ Comment on this story ]

[ Subscribe to the comments on this story ]